My new favorite R’s are Renew—-Refurbish——Revive….. Reawaken, Renovate, Regenerate, Re-ignite, Remember, Rejoice….O.k. that is more than three, but there are just so many RE-words that describe where I am at right now. As often with me, internal movement starts in the physical realm, the material world, in the doing, the creating the acting…And then through the motion and action it starts to percolate down deep, inside me, into my thoughts, my dreams, my being, and then it begins, the deeper work on my soul.
The renewal I am feeling these days started with a few little projects this winter, silly ones really….Refurbishing our down comforters for example. My husband and I were sleeping under three, piled upon us, drug around from the past, and we are talking 20 years of sleep under these feathered friends. Yet we were still cold. You know how it goes, the feather sneaks off to the corners and even with a little daily fluffing, you just can’t get them into the middle anymore…So it seemed it was high time to get new ones…but what about all those perfectly good feathers? I don’t know much about the Down industry, but I was disturbed thinking about all those feathers going to waste, all those little geese and their feather growing efforts….Yes we came up with a few things to do with them….compost, hand-made toys, simply re-sewing the comforters myself…But I finally called the Company Store and they said they have a whole department in Wisconsin who take pride in washing, fluffing and re-stuffing your comforters. Excellent!!! In the end, I didn’t save much money, as new ones would have only cost a bit more, but we got 2 new fluffy warm colorful comforters and 2 pillows out of our beat down old three and I was delighted with the Renewed energy it brought to our bed, though we still weren’t sleeping much, the sleep we do get feel more Refreshing than ever!!
The next area was the backyard, for those of you who have been to my house, you understand, and for those of you who haven’t…well I am not going to post a picture, just use your imagination.. Let’s Just say, it is a work in progress and treasure trove of parts and pieces, a gallery of ideas, projects and things to do….someday, everyday, forever. I can be impatient and overly attached to the material world. I want it pretty and neat, I want to defeat and reign high and mighty over chaos….But now is not the time for that, now is a time to release control, to revive what we do have and what has been sleeping these winter months and reawaken what can be renovated this spring. So I began with my first priority, potting soil of course… but bending over is hard with a baby on my back… but the yard is full of mud, snow and stuff, no place for a 9 month old…So I spotted the cattle tank we use in the summer for water catchment.. I pulled it out and cleaned it, laid down a Buffalo robe, another treasure hiding in storage without the chance to realize it’s full potential…and Voila!! A play pen. I don’t need to buy another disposable plastic thing for my kids safety, no no…This works fantastically…And with hidden magic……
When Jaengus finally was bored with playing in his new set up, I took off my work gloves and garden clogs and curled up in there with him. Warm and soft on that old Buffalo, and when we laid down so I could nurse him I looked up at the sky, wintry tree silhouettes, clouds drifting, birds swooping by. From there you can’t see the mud, junk and millions of to-dos, just openness, vastness, infinity!! A new look, a new perspective, my yard is fantastic from in there, and so am I. Resting with my babe, after the movement I make to revive my surroundings, allowing stillness to let the motion go deeper and renewal happen inside me. I guess my biggest learning lately is that I can DO all in my capacity to renew myself and my surroundings, but it is only when I stop and open myself up, allowing forces greater than me to do their work, when I rest and look up, when I am quiet and simply being, that is when it is my turn to receive the gift of true Renewal. As I breath life back into things around me, I must let the breath of the world breathe life back into me.